But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
