Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
i believe in u and ur pee
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize