I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
