I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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