Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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