im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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