I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
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