When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
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If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
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People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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