id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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