is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
