weddingsv make me drug and hornr
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
Randomize
