perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
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Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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