Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
