I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
