sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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