I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize