this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
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No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
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Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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