READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize