yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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