Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize
