69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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