would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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