what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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