Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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