You were right. It hurts to walk today.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize