Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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