Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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