her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
Randomize
