How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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