she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
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