Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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