i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I hope mine doesn't look like that
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.