How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
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