I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
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I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
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No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.