He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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