You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Randomize