I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Randomize
