A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Randomize