Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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