i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Randomize
