I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize