how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
