i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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