theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
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