Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
Randomize