I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
