oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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