you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize