the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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