Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
