Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
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