I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
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